One of the main obstacles you will likely have as a parent is Sibling bonding. Sometimes sibling bonding may seem like all you do is break up conflicts. However, it will undoubtedly pay off if you put in the effort and engage in your children’s relationships. And with these amazing techniques, your family’s sibling bonding will quickly improve.
Assess sibling conflict
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Quickly assess the severity of your children’s disputes. Stay out of minor to moderate conflicts. Give your children the opportunity to settle their conflict on their own. However, it could be necessary to intervene if the altercation becomes more serious. Siblings Without Rivalry, written by parenting specialists Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, is available on Amazon for more information on how to handle sibling conflicts.
Sibling bonding time
By nature, siblings don’t always want to hang out together. Parents must instill this bond and establish the tone for their children. Designate a weekday specifically for the kids. Make it special; parents are not permitted. (Or, if you’re concerned, perhaps your parents are nearby.) Create a fun ritual for the kids, such as a movie night just for them, a sibling scavenger hunt, or a play they develop and perform for the family.
You can also engage in some of what is known as psycho-education in the field of mental health. You can educate your children about sibling rivalry and how to get along with their siblings by using bibliotherapy, or therapy through books. The subject of sibling rivalry and relationships is well-covered in a number of really good children’s books.
Use books for sibling bonding
One excellent strategy to teach your children about life and relationships is to encourage reading in your family. Wonderful tales like those in the books mentioned above can promote sibling ties in your family. That can also be used to teach other skills. Every kind of life lesson is covered in children’s books.
Quality one-to-one
Set aside regular, unique times to spend with each child separately. Although it may seem counterintuitive to the idea of sibling bonding, giving each child some particular time reserved only for them really makes room for more constructive sibling connection. When they get plenty of your attention, they don’t require as much rivalry and competition. You might be amazed at how much respect your children have for one-on-one time with their parents, even when it’s not their turn.
Equitable laws for sibling bonding
“Life’s Not Fair” was my mother’s catchphrase when I was a child, and I could have sworn she said it all the time. As a child, I detested it, but as an adult, I realized that my mother was usually right about most things. Fairness and equality don’t always provide the desired results. Giving your children the same treatment can be more detrimental than helpful. They might receive the same care, but it’s doubtful they’ll get what they require.
Every child is unique, and each developmental stage is accompanied by a unique set of needs. Make rules, penalties, and expectations specific to the requirements of each child. By doing so, you can ensure that your kids are prepared for success and that they take responsibility for their own actions.
Role of your family
You must keep in mind that every youngster plays a part in any conflictual encounter. A 5-year-old is not necessarily completely innocent just because she is younger than the 10-year-old sibling who just yelled at him.
I’ve seen that happen a lot: a parent is preoccupied and punishes the older child even though “they should know better” while absolving the smaller child. However, in my observation of exchanges, I have witnessed instances where the younger child purposefully badgers the elder sibling until they respond. It’s amusing to observe the young genius at work.
Healthy boundaries for sibling bonding
You must keep in mind that every youngster plays a part in any conflictual encounter. A 5-year-old is not necessarily completely innocent just because she is younger than the 10-year-old sibling who just yelled at him.
I’ve seen that happen a lot: a parent is preoccupied and punishes the older child even though “they should know better” while absolving the smaller child. However, in my observation of exchanges, I have witnessed instances where the younger child purposefully badgers the elder sibling until they respond. It’s amusing to observe the young genius at work.
Negotiations
Start by respecting the disagreement. Children are only encouraged to dig in, escalate, or strengthen their stance when parents downplay the importance of the issue they are arguing over.
Verify the cause of their angst in order to alleviate the issue. They will advance as a result of this. Remember that every behaviour has a cause, even if the child isn’t aware of it, as you model it for the youngster. Kids learn how to solve problems more quickly when you assist them in sharing and communicating the initial source of their annoyance. They learn empathy from this as well. They are more equipped to propose win-win solutions after they are able to understand their brother’s or sister’s point of view.
Don’t play favourites for sibling bonding
Most parents have a favorite child, according to research, but try your best not to let that one knows. Your children will feel more secure as long as you don’t show them any favouritism. Moreover, resist the need to compare your children to one another. Your child may not change his behaviour in response to the inquiry “Why can’t you sit still and be quiet like your sister?” but you can be sure that he will begin to detest her.
When dealing with undesirable behaviours and sibling rivalry, be honest and direct and try to avoid taking sides. It’s crucial that your children don’t feel treated differently in order to foster positive sibling relationships. The sibling bond will quickly become tainted by animosity.
References:
Incredible strategies to improve sibling relationships
What should be siblings ideal age?
